Lawn Darts were a game from a simpler, more naive time. Sure, they could embed themselves in your little sister’s head just as easily as the lawn, but they were fun. Now they’re back.
They’re back thanks to the unfortunately named Jarts In Your Heart web site, which sells the banned items thanks to a little bit of legal gymnastics. You see, since lawn darts (or “Jarts” as they’re known here) transform so easily from an innocent backyard game into deadly weapon depending on who’s holding them, Jarts In Your Heart has to sell the plastic fins and metal tips separately. Sad.
Jarts in the Heart isn’t bitter about the game’s fate in the slightest, of course:
“These Jarts are NOT toys. They should be kept out of reach from children. They should be treated as you would a bow and arrow. These have and will puncture a person. If you have the IQ of a monkey please don’t buy lawn darts. I will not sell to anyone under 18. I do not have many sets left so when they’re gone they’re gone […] Jarts in Your Heart will not be held liable for any death or injury caused by these Jarts. By purchasing from Jarts in your heart you agree to these terms. Again, I can not stress this enough. If you’re an idiot just don’t buy Jarts, stick to playing Horseshoes, Baggo or that ladder ball game.”
The total package is $65. The snarky, snotty product description above is free. Let’s be safe out there.
[ Jarts In Your Heart ]
One Response to “Lawn Darts”
Very cool, but it looks like it’ll be quite hard. I love how you say “Lawn Darts were a game” and then they say “These Jarts are NOT toys.” 😛