Post20 Things Programmers Say When Something Is Not Working

20. That’s weird….

19. It’s never done that before.

18. It worked yesterday.

17. How is that possible?

16. It must be a hardware problem.

15. What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?

14. There is something funky in your data. OR It’s a data problem, not a program problem.

13. I haven’t touched that module in weeks!

12. You must have the wrong version.

11. It’s just some unlucky coincidence.

10. I can’t test everything!

9. THIS can’t be the source of THAT.

8. It works, but it hasn’t been tested.

7. Somebody must have changed my code.

6. Did you check for a virus on your system?

5. Even though it doesn’t work, how does it feel?

4. You can’t use that version on your system.

3. Why do you want to do it that way?

2. Where were you when the program blew up?

And the Number One Thing Programmers Say When Their Programs Don’t Work:

1. It works on my machine.

Update

Some more funny quotes from the comments below:

1. File a Bug ( Thank you Isaac Z. Schlueter)
2. That’s not a bug, that’s a feature ( Thank you Girlgeek)

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Comments 12 Responses to “20 Things Programmers Say When Something Is Not Working”

  1. You forgot “File a bug” and “Screw you, go away.”

  2. Well, 1, 7, 9, 11, 13 and 18 are relevant clues as to the cause. 17, 19 and 20 are not uncommon and are usually an indication of an upcoming interesting debugging session 🙂

  3. Definitely needs “File a Bug!” but it looks great 🙂

  4. How about: “That’s not a bug, that’s a feature”?

  5. I know when programming I’m constantly saying “Hmmmmm…”.

    Funny article sooo true.

  6. Certainly awesome collection of painfully common quotes.

  7. Try rebooting your box.

  8. I think these all are correct 🙂

  9. I recently started to say: “Bring me the log-files, or it didn’t happen!” 🙂

  10. What have you done? You must have done something wrong.

  11. I don’t see it here. You must have been drinking.
    OR
    I told you too much vodka in the morning would destroy your liver eventually

  12. I’d add: “keep working, this error is not important”